yay for christmas!!!

four wheel sledding on pewauke lake, wisconsin just before we hit a
slushy patch and opened the lake up a bit. had an indiana jones moment
as we barely escaped our own wake...

greetings from doha

18 december 2009 thursday

walk out of the ofice trailer and you can feel the impending rain. isn't this a desert? already this morning there have been two torrential downpours and sure enough, the tin roof of the restroom calls out the first drops and then it's a cacophony of sheets of rain. we run through the sand and mud.

it doens't feel like the earth here. it feels like they've colonized the moon. and as robert said to me--they built it, they continue to build--construction in all directions--even though it sits empty. they colonized the moon before anyone was ready to come.

today is national qatar holiday. the flags are everywhere. cars are covered with them. incessant traffic. the cars all all luxury and suv's. and they are all driven by men. an avalanche painted in glittery burgundy to mimic the flag rolls by. just for today?


note: i did not take this picture, but it's very representative of what i saw. except i never saw such a normal car. only luxury here.

i was picked up from the airport in a damn jaguar for chrissake!
but i couldn't take pictures. my camera doesn't leave the hotel because it would be confiscated....bummer.

the roads run straight like arteries through the expanse of flat desert. on either side, ceremonial tents have been erected just for today, surrounded by rims of uphostered armchairs and a sea of carpets. horses and camels stand waiting. camels.
and men in their distinctive dress. banners depicting someone royal. the sheik? someone we will serve.
the desert spans around us endless. paperflat, without vegetation. subdivisions stand empty. there is no sense of supply and demand. just supply. surplus.
all is orderly. there is no chaos.

welcome to doha

customs, qatar palace style

at the base of the airplane stairs a smiling woman held a sign proclaiming "miss kitty" and "miss margaret". she guided us onto a shuttle bus. once inside, i grin. the men who aren't wearing their thobe--their long white robes and turbans, are dressed identically to me. i've nailed the local dude dress. the immigrant to qatar dude dress: flair pants, long sleeve patterned button down shirt and a sweater vest. all of us. but i'm jealous of the guy's vest that looks like it's make of shiny blue spun plastic.

we pull off the runway up to the airport. instead of the standard mile long custom lines, we are whisked to a lounge of comfy chairs and espresso. she takes our pastsports and baggage tags and we barely have time to use the restroom before she's returned. but we do go to the restroom. what we see there feels so instinctively wrong. the local women have left the purses on the public airport restroom sink while locking themselves inside of the stalls. just leave 'em on the counter. whoa.
so five minutes after landing and we're being walked past the customs line, and welcomed to the country. i haven't touched my luggage since new york and it remains that way. everytime i reach for a door handle i am tsked away.

kitty joe's journal flies to qatar. part two

kitty joe, learning about foreign culture in the dubai airport.

couldn't decipher much as we landed in dubai. all apparant was an in-organic development. the gridded uniformity to the shape of the city and enrivons. like a cartoon world. the airport was posh. i felt like a ragamuffin even in my 'nice' 7 jeans that i swear i never wore to the rink, my vintage blouse and a pilled up sweater vest. i suppose i'll just need to get used to the feeling of being a ragamuffin, because, essentially, that's what i am.

you can feel disdain for a set of values, a superficial way of being or judging. you can stand by the person that you are. but it doens't stop you from squirming when enveloped in opulence and all slickness.

we laughed at the lavish luxury car giveaway displays in the city making daily world news headlines of financial collapse. we laughed at the christmas tree displays in a muslim country. christmas trees so perfect and artificial. like those on a set of a soap opera. just know that if there were gifts beaneath, with big bows atop, they'd be the kind whose individually paper-wrapped box tops would lift right off for the ease of the scene.

wait! stop. the plane from dubai to doha is lifting off and i think i'm looking at the tallest building in the world. whoa.

we wander through gift shops and my heart breaks. i have enough money to pay for my cab to and from the airport, and my visa. these are all re--imbursible business expenses and every meal and lodging and transportation from hotel to palace will be covered. but there is not a dime for shopping or exploring. now, being uber-poor --since i now carry the combined weight of student loans cutting off, credit cards maxed out and said run out student loans suddenly due for payment STARTING ON CHRISTMAS DAY--maybe doesn't bother me so much in regard to myself. what's killing me, especially now that its xmas, is that i see little tschotchkys and i want to buy them for all of the kids in my life. i see the camels wearing santa hat cheesy ornaments and i want to pick them up for my sisters. and i can't. it's not even that i shouldn't. it's that i can't. should just avoid the hsops altogether. aw, and with that positive spin, we start our descent into doha.

i am thrilled. i need not be a greedy consumer. because even to desperately want to give came sometimes be selfish. this guilt is selfish.

balls of fire glow in the sea below me. they are bright in the pitch blackness like i've never seen. some kind of oil extraction? what is the fire? my own ignorance astounds me.

usually i do quite a bit of research before traveling, but to this country, even to its pronunciation, i am a stranger. i simply haven't had the time. welcome to doha! welcome to adventure! i land a day early. a luxury of time to acclimate, to luxuriate at the ritz carlton.



holy glitter! i've never seen such a sparkly city! the buildings are literally glittering like disco balls! such strange contrast to the surrounding sand.
welcome to adventure. i've already in twenty four hours eaten more that i had all week, it seems!

the flight attendants begin the flight with a hat attached to a white gauzy veil. when the flight begins, they take them off. it seems odd.

dubai airport: prayer rooms beside starbucks.

best. business. trip. ever! a really boring mind locked blow by blow by kitty joe

16th or 17th of december?
unsure of the date.
made it through work with minimal required tie up for the walking tornado. the boss despaired, "i'm scared! i can't do this without you!"
and jade held me and begged me to come home.

ah! here i decided to make a list to blow through my impressions without beleaguering myself with transitions and complete thoughts. but i can't ever tell a concise story, can i?
the boss dropped me off thanking me. "it's true what you've said. it's been a year of incredible accomplishments! have a great christmas.....uh...i didn't have time to get you a gift." at this i laughed. we don't do that!

once free and inside my apartment i felt three distinct states of being wash over me. first i became excited, no, giddy with the thought of the extraordinary trip i was about to take. an unknown piece of my world expanded, if only briefly and superficially, within the bubble of the ritz carlton. but still--the palace!? come on! the persian gulf! qatar! layover in dubai! i will, by hook or by crook, swim in the sea between saudi arabia and iran!

in a moment of splurge, i ordered chinese food. no time to cook and the phone conversation i had with the airline (emirates) earlier was ridiculous. i had requested a vegetarian meal and he said there would be no veg meal option because there would be no meal service at all. wait. what?! on a jet blue flight for five hours, i understand. i pack my burrito and they shower me with chips and cookies.
but twelve and a half hours with no meal?! i was shocked.
i ordered chinese food.
and since i'd eaten my customary day ration of peanut butter toast at 6:30am, it being twelve hours later, i was ravenous. but a whole order of sesame noodles on an empty stomach? perhaps not the wisest...

excitement was replaced with moaning gluttony. and then a sudden coma. surely i couldn't fly to the middle east tonight. how would i keep my eyes open another minute?

and then my jade came home. i was so grateful for the chance to say goodbye (it had been unclear if he would make it home in time from work). so grateful for a man to be sad that i was leaving , to miss me already, but to also feel excitement for what i would see.
this had not formerly been the case with others.
but jade, he carried my suitcase to the car and sent me off with big love. actually, it was his suitcase. ah, how many suitcase sets have i lost to the bedbugs? two sets, to be presise. enough. not that i'm bitter.

and so, i rock the peterbilt duffle. got a problem with that? talk to the palace. i am their guest. it said so in my 'welcome to doha' packet.

so to the airport i go. 25 degrees and i only wear a blouse because hello? car service both ways and 80 degree destination. i feel wrapped in luxury. or unwrapped by luxury.

i arrive at jfk a little less than 90 minutes before my flight. some people advised 3 hours, some 2. but the gentleman (and now i use that term loosely, and wonder why i trusted a man who tried to tell me we'd be sent for 12.5 hours with no food). he told me if i checked in online, i only needed 90 minutes. the emirates website went so far as to suggest 60. so it was without urgencey that i made my way to the security line. oh, that was naive. the eight lines of people who should have (if we were, for example, in the jet blue terminal) been routed into eight lines of xray machines. instead, there were two lines and a nightmare merge reminicent of L.A. rush house and enough road rage to start a war.

we stood in mosh pit like conditions, growling at each other, each trying to extract pity and perhaps advance our place in 'line', with fears of missing our flights. more terrifying to instead realize were were all fucked. seeing the monitors flashing 'dubai: last call', and having finally swallowed the guilt of others excuses, i pushed past the man with no ear, the toddler insistantly performing the fake cry and the unfortunate chap whose 'british sensibilities' were offended, i finally emerged panting from the xray machine, running to the gate, shoelaces clicking behind me, belt hanging loose around my neck, laptop haphazardly slung under one armpit, clear toiletry bag under the other, open peterbilt duffle covered with cat hair, passport and boarding pass pinched between my teeth. classy. but i got on that damn plane.

i was seated with peggy, who i will work with for the next week. i had earlier grumpily shot down jade's optimistic flight consolations. "i don't need any new friends!" i feared discofort, awkward interactions, but instead we hit it off beautifully, feeling quite a kinshop of experiences and values.
and the flight, by the way, did include meals. three of them. of course, mine being vegetarian. at the check in counter, when i related my phone experience, the counter girl was shocked. "you should file a complaint!" and as much of a fan of our friend blue, i'm sorry to say that emirates kicked jetblue's ass. i spent the first hour flipping through the touch screen of hundreds of current, classic, foreign movies, tv series, make your own music playlists, podcasts, computer cord, power plug ins, usb ports, blankets, little purse full of sox and face masks and funny colorful 'do not disturb' style stickers which i was temped to stick to my forehead. hot towels, hot meals, free wine. in economy class. i watched 3 moves, 4 episodes of 'flight of the conchords', a documentary of frank lloyd wright, and still slept like a baby. happy.

oh my god, i'm going there!

it just hit me that i'm on my way to take a plane to qatar, a tiny arab emirate in the sea between iran and saudi arabia. i have been so overwhelmed trying to tie my life in a tidy knot (a challenging task to be sure! jade likes to call me the walking tornado...it just might be the most accurate description anyone's given me....) to get to this point that i only just had this HUGE excitement--the travel bug in me is flying, buzzing and crashing against the inside of my head. and still my brain doesn't understand. we're going where?! i'm so excited. i hope to give you all of the mundane and exotic details. supposedly the ritz carlton. yes, that's me at the ritz carlton has internet service that the palace is paying for me.
explanations later. for now i will just leave you with the riddle of an idea that the royal palace is sponsoring my blogging for the next five or six days. how ya like me now?

22 de marzo: sunday

21 marzo: sunday. jade. mi vida

i hesitate before i post this because i want to write a long post about how i fell in love. but time does not allow. so i move forward. another day, i promise.

20 marzo 20009: saturday--the only surfer in guanabo, cuba

i feel like i've posted this before. because it was my protype--the first of the series that i printed and experimented with the typing. apologies if i'm being redundant, but anyway, this is where it falls in the timeline of the project. i love this one.

little baby d turns one.

you can say it. it's true. she looks like a doll. or cindy lou who?

here i am flexing the auntie muscles, babysiting baby d shortly after she learned to walk.
she belongs to eddie and maria, of the lifetime friend/my family of nyc category.
kudos to them for surviving a year of parenthood while enduring medical residency madness.

19 marzo 2009: rez

still with the sting of a midnight jellyfish on our backs,
we spend the stormy day on a cuban beach

helicopter!

pre-flight wipedown




our shadow

on saturday i took my first helicopter ride. perhaps i'll talk more about it later, especially in relation to another very different experience i had with the sky last week. for now, i will say it was incredible. can't share many photos as they were taken for a job, but here are some peripheral images that evoke the experience nicely. my lens was too big to capture the interior of the chopper except in close up detail....

el 19 del marzo: farah y el primer desfile de san patricio en la habana, cuba

two people made this parade happen. i was one of them. it was amazing.

farah, calle o'reilly's most renowned drag queen, led our procession--a jab at the exclusionary customs of the new york and boston parades...

if you want to see more photos from the parade, click here.

el 18 de marzo

17 marzo 2009: son of che

i know i could do well to leave jenny 101 up for a few days for more for y'all to admire, but i'm so excited that my project has just landed in cuba, one of the most magical times of my life, that i'm just eager to post.
again, i didn't write text for son of che. he was my little cuban leprechaun. my first day in cuba involved non-stop running around. the repossession of luggage seized under suspicion, the procuring of supplies and the pursuit of permission.
i came to cuba to organize the first annual st. patrick's day parade in havana. this was my job. che is a tattoo artist who rallied a crew of cuban youth covered in piercings and tattoos to carry our banners and ride bmx bikes and juggle fire in the procession. i gave his son a green rose. where i got it i have no idea.
my head was still spinning. and didn't stop for a long time. perhaps still hasn't.

monday, 16 march 2009: jenny 101

i didn't get around to typing text for this image, i think because it just felt too important.
what do you say about a 101 year old woman whose beachside caribbean birthday you happen upon on a 3 hour layover to havana?

saturday, 15 march: dolly

friday, 14 march: chris habana

wednesday, 11 march 2009 vaughn

someone, fetch me my teeth!

last night jade and i met after work for a seemingly naive and innocuous swing by art opening that turned into a surreal event of judgment.

first, to combat the inertia and laziness. jade had labored all day (saturday too!) hanging sheetrock, and i had traced all over the bronx in search of secret nyc green carts for a photo assignment. we were both beat and the trek from chelsea to deep alphabet city (avenue D and east 3rd) without a cab is something that would make the most energetic new yorker shudder.

but i had that little fairy called guilt and 'my word' hanging over my head to crack the whip and drag jade down the sidewalk toward a strange apartment building with absolutely no indication it contained an art gallery within. if i didn't have a copy of the invitation in my hand i swear i would have turned back thinking i had the wrong address. which is precisely what jade tried to get me to do. but after that walk? no way.

we tiptoed up the stairs and behold--aymar ccopacatty's show. sometimes, and these times come more rarely after thirteen years in the city, new york gives you a precious memory of what it felt like when you first landed here. where every staircase leads to an exciting mystery and a turn of a corner leads you somewhere that feels like another world. these moments are beautiful.

and there was aymar, dressed in his peruvian hat--not the knitted kind with llamas, but the leather kind that stands up to the austrailian or cowboy variety--knitting from a ball of shredded blue tarp spun yarn around his neck, surrounded by his awesome pieces woven from trash hung on cavases like paintings. though showing at 'a gathering of tribes' gallery, they managed to completely jump from the context of folk art into conceptual. a beautiful triumph and synthesis of his gemini split upbring in rhode island and peru. jade thanked me for dragging him there and declared it the best show he'd seen in a long time (naturally other than the ones we've just labored all summer over--but he's too modest to include those...).

having lasted the day on one peanut butter and jelly sandwich each, jade and i eventually migrated to the cheese and wine room. it was there that someone asked me to reach behind where i stood to grab his jacket. this one? i asked. and he gasped in mock horror: acid wash?! what do you take me for?
and i'd had enough wine to launch kitty joe style into a story. now, perhaps i haven't been writing enough drivel on my blog. you know, my blog is actually a tool of pity for those who surround me in daily life. it works as a filter so that i have somewhere to outlet these stupid memories and associations that i find so very important, thus saving the spoken world from my trivialities. the look of sheer boredom on the surrounding folks faces reminded me of this fact. and so, i'll double whammy and share here too. so this is what i said:

when i was in junior high, i wanted a jean jacket desperately, feverishly. i had no hope of attaining said object of luxury as it was not in the realm of mervyn's or the outlets (this was when you had to drive to san leandro to the outlets and they were in disparate wherehouses, not in strip malls). and then lo and behold, for reasons completely unbeknownst to me, my parents surprised me with the coveted jean jacket--just slipped it into my bedroom as if it had always been there. their expressions were proud and happy, but my stomach sank.
it was acid-washed. it was all the rage. but i hated acid-wash. i didn't listen to vanilla ice--i listened to the cure! how could this happen to me?! my dream come true turned into a nightmare.
but i was a good kid. a super guilty and obedient kid, and i understood very well that my parents were making a very special gesture. and i'd better show some gratitude fast. it even makes me squirm to admit this to this day. but i'm such a sucker for a story i just can't help myself, and maybe it's even a little theraputic to get it off my chest. though no need to alert said parental units if they're not already spying this.
so i wore that jacket every day to school for two years. i mean, i didn't actually have a choice--it was the jacket.
the end.

so two things happened when i told the story. for one, at the anti-climactic end, a tumbleweed cut through the clouds of east village art gallery smoke and rolled through the suddenly silent room.

and another, more horrific: when i set the scene and said,

'when i was in junior high in 1988....'
one of the dudes standing behind the bar gasped and yelped, far too enthusiastically,

'oh my god, i was only born the year before!!!'
which activated my super lazer eyes which accidentally burned him to a crisp on the spot.
ladies and gentlemen, i've gotten really old. i don't know how it happened, but it's true.

and i'll leave the second story for later because that's about all of the typing my arthritic hands can manage for now.

rest in peace.

dear grandma donna,
i'm sorry i couldn't fly out to your memorial service today. if i could have, i would have brought a pretty notepad for all of the ladies and maybe a gravitationally powered mag-lite for the men.

please stand clear of the closing doors

okay, so i'm not just bumming you out with my stories of late night crime--here i feature one of the beauties of new york city--the subway entertainment.
footage courtesy of my sister abbie, who came out to visit a year ago exactly, i'm reminded, to celebrate her birthday. happy birthday again abbie!

the people in this first video were so full of infectious and ridiculous fun. happy makers. except the guy just under the two-minute mark, who wasn't too thrilled to be surrounded or infected...



and then, of course, the classic.

bear crying wolf

i was having a frightening yet laughable dream that a bear was stalking me through a cabin window. i wanted to be quiet and lay low, but even though i was awake, i couldn't stop snoring. loud snoring. boy snoring. in fact, kind of like jade snoring. could it be my dream was intercepted by the ambient audio of the room?

no time to ruminate on that, though it now brings me chuckles, because my dream was pierced by another, more pressing audio--that of a girl calling out for help. her cries escalated to a volume you only hope you could attain in crisis. and suddenly we're wide awake--bears chased away--jade thowing on his carharts and boots to run outside.

on a corner that last week saw a violent rape, wanted posters still plastered to every window, naturally, our minds went there.
but no, only a drunk girl who didn't want to pay her cab fare.
something made me really angry about this. that we were taken in to care for her and duped by her selfish false alarm.
but perhaps more frightening was the fact that jade was the lone person who ran out to her rescue. what if she had been in real danger? no one would care.

10 march 2009--john john

and while we're on the topic of john-johns...i had a neighbor while growing up cursed with that redundant name. he was a jerk kid. i guess sometimes little boys can't help themselves. john-john delighted in seeing me cry. he was a year or two older than me and it seemed twice my size. his large german mother was the only other in the neighborhood (except mine) whose bellowing call reverberated from their doorstep and through the fields to reach us where we played. but 'playing' with john-john was not a thing of happiness for me, as it usually entailed him stuffing gardener snakes in my mailbox just before i obsessively and promptly retrieved the letters at 3:15 each day. he also bore the distinction of being the first kid (in a line of many many) to tease my name. just the sound of him singing, "here.....kitty kitty kitty" brought tears. and 'kitty litter'? forget it. i was a wreck.

09 march 2009 b&h

taken on the sly under the guise of testing a new lens. oh, wait, i was testing a new lens....

08 march 2009--allison

07 march 2009 bruce

06 march 2009--mac premo

04 march 2009 heather

quote of the week

road rage turns almost violent
large man gets out of car and has his arms inside driver's window, screaming.
scrawny car man cowers behind wheel waiting for ass-kicking

cabbie next door rolls down window and yells:

"you stupid! this ain't detroit!"

thursday, 03 march 2009 lisa

as always, click on photo to enlarge....

unfortunate fact learned at the gallery today:

duct tape is actually not translucent. who knew? waste of a ten block walk to the hardware store...

stoopid

midnight last night.
holding up the front end of a battleship made of reeds along with 7 others.
i see a menacing nail sticking out a of piece of wood. i have been dodging these nails for four months, successfully.
i turn back to warn the others.

'guys, there's a really big......GODDAMNIT!!!!'

my god it went in fast and deep. ug. so now ms. project manager is limping and hanging her head. battle in two days and already the home team is wounded....

quote of the week

me: did you know that my venus is in virgo?

him: kitty joe! it's far too early in the morning to talk dirty.

saturday, 01 march 2009: patsy's grandson

saturday, 28 february 2009: patsy

dear kiyomi

dear kiyomi,
it's your birthday. i woke up this morning composing a blog post to honor you. it's nearing the end of the day and still i only have 30 seconds. can you forgive me and accept belated wishes tomorrow.

love,
your overwhelmed, workaholic friend, kitty joe

friday, 27 february 2009

let's re-visit my person of the project, shall we? a cop-out, maybe, but better than totally neglecting the blog. now that the project has been submitted, i can show you the images in their more finished state, with typed text. may be necessary (and helpful) to click on the photos for an enlarged image.

what i've been up to

last july we did research and wrote a proposal.
in october we harvested truckloads of an invasive reed from a lake in queens.
in november we wrote up a budget and signed a contract for a museum residency.
in december we stripped the leaves from the reeds and pulped greenish paper to produce a 4' x 2' print.
in march we were forced out of our studio because the reeds to the ceiling were a fire hazard.
in april we moved the reeds into our new 500,000 square foot abandoned hockey rink residency studio.
in may i graduated from the new school.
the following week the rains came and we started building boats out of reeds.
in june the rain still poured down every day and we thought maybe the boats would come in handy for a noah-style escape. jade moved into the studio and started building a pig ship to include in our armada.
in july, we finally got a meeting with the parks department to beg for permission to flood a fountain for the battle that we'd already labored on for a year.
in august, come hell or highwater, we will float.
i have had one day off in two months. if you'd like to hang out, come to the rink!

quote of last week

overheard in line at the breezy dog hot dog cart at fort tilden:

8 year old boy flexing muscles for mother and little brother:
"you see these muscles?! i got 'em from eating ICE CREAM!!"

a man after my own heart.
this quote is now in heavy rotation in my vocab.

quote of the week

while dragging a foam zebra across an abandonned hockey rink

jade: "ouch...i think i just pulled my love handle!"

send in the depends!

okay. so i get to work at 8am every day. and i stay usually until about 11pm. in the daytime we listen to npr. we hear about iran and cat stevens' new life and sunscreen and such. at night we need something more to keep us going, so at 6 o'clock the radio station turns. last night we tried out the oldies station. now i was raised on the oldies station. i know what i'm going to find there. i expect 'silhouettes on the shade' and the big bopper belting out 'chantilly lace'. but not last night. last night i hung my head as the OLDIES station played 'live to tell', 'papa don't preach' and 'owner of a lonely heart'.

i am an oldie. oh jeez. i mean geez.

by popular demand

okay, so i wanted to tell you a little story about how i fell in love and a bit about this beautiful man. but alas, working 14-16 hour days 7 days a week doesn't exactly push me to remember my blog. but since y'all can't wait, i appease you with some images of jade.

keep holdin' off the zombies....rest in peace, michael

i was fixin' to respond to repeated requests for pictures of jade, but it just didn't seem right not to first say good bye to my childhood friend, michael.

may he find more peace where there is no fame.

break

okay, so i'm guilty of neglect. rather than bring more time, graduation has brought the buckling down and settling into work--the paying the piper on all of the things i've put off due to school. haven't filled you in on my riveting life of late. and i'm guilty of causing confusion too. all this vague talk of new love and jade and i never even leveled with y'all and told you that after nearly 6 years, i finally did what i knew i should have done three years ago but was too complacent and afraid to do--i ended my relationship with my long-term live-in boyfriend. it may seem sudden to some because i've tried to put on a happy face, tried hard to make it work for years. and finally, i boarded a plane to cuba and was hit with that bang bang epiphany that looking down from thousands of feet at a little planet brings. and i shook my head and asked, what am i doing sticking with this unhappiness? it's not that he was bad or wrong. we just weren't the match. and finally, just like that, i was done. it's incredible how you can undo 6 years in 6 days. stay tuned for the requested updates and photos of new life.

oh, and i didn't smash this turkish trivet. it smashed itself.

blog/flickr tutorial

okay, so i want to share these pictures with you guys from my graduation week. ah, what a week it was! i'll stop there.

anyway, it seems redundant to give you this little picto-bucket viewing, since i've already posted them to the right here on flickr. but i figured it's a good opportunity to draw attention to and acquaint you with the features of my lovely site in case you've been to shy to take a look around. this may keep you busy during times like now when i'm either too busy or uninspired to entertain you with my brilliant writing....

over on the right hand column, you can find a link to my photography site, generously and beautifully designed by emir balik. under that you'll find a link to my 'serious' flickr site. under that, my snapshot flickr site.
still further below, you can see who is officially 'following' my blog, and you can join them if you like. membership does not get you a free lollipop, but it does get you a pea sized photo on my blog!
then of course there are links to some of my favorite people (friends and cyberfriends hand in hand), a totally accurate and serious bio by my dear friend matt peake , an archive of old posts (you can just start from the beginning and pretend they are current--i guarentee them to be as irrelevant as anything fresh i would write!). and then some more junk like my favorite books and music. because that's so important.

dismissed.

it's about frickin' time!

i was an overachiever all throughout school. i was the teacher's pet in every class. i was the kid who stayed late after school to teach my gay math teacher who still lived with his parents our junior high cheerleading routines, the president of the model un. i took summer classes at university of california at berkeley. when i was in junior high. i was groomed to attend a four year university straight out of high school. but somewhere along the line i burnt out. i got scared. i didn't know what i wanted to do with my life. and that overwhelming question that seemed to need answering made me dread college. i made it as far as my associates degree and then i got the hell outta dodge--defected to new york city, where i told everyone i would "work for a year to save up money for school" then dive in.
right.
any new yorker would snicker at that statement. generally the first year in new york beats you to a pulp. you're lucky if you come out even, let alone save money. and so it was i got caught up in the rat race. working to live, living to work. i was comforted to have a reason to put off school. after a while, i told myself it didn't matter to me. who needed a degree? i was making more money than many of my masters holding friends. but every year, come may, when, as an event planner or captain i would work my tenth graduation in a week, i would feel this big aching sadness. this unfinished business that hurt me. it wasn't about money or finding a career. it was just about achieving that goal that i took for granted since kindergarten, as though the degree would just magically appear on default.
finally, 30 was approaching. it was time. in the spring of 2005 i enrolled at that new school university. overcoming my fear to apply and begin was monumental. kim will recall walking me past the very building that i just spent the last four years of my life in, and me having what could only be described as a panic attack, while she went inside alone to request information that i refused to look at.
once i began though, i was in my element. teacher's pet again. loving my classes. studying photography. for the first time in, i don't know--ever, i felt like i was doing what i was supposed to be doing with my life. it was a blissful feeling.
slowly i weaned myself off of my soul-confining, though flexible and well paying catering job and threw myself into the art world, where i should have started out when i arrived in new york at twenty years old--were i not so scared.
so, in short, i've blown through the savings from my cushy job. i've racked up a staggering amount of student and credit card debt. i will not be scoring any higher-paying jobs due to my prestigious bachelor's degree. that's not the point. i did it for myself. for my peace of mind. and i couldn't be more thrilled.
yesterday i picked up my cap and gown. despite the poking fun at the pomp of it, and how old and behind it makes me feel, when i pulled that goldenrod hood out of the package, i got tears in my eyes. this evening i will graduate (divisional with name calling--and i don't me dipshit!). and again on friday (the whole school, probably with some protesters and the whole regalia at madison square garden)!
i'm having a party. if you somehow missed my invitation, just come to my house tonight at 8:30pm--64 diamond. the parents are here. and, incidentally, the catering hasn't fully left my blood. there will be a lot of food!

brilliant idea of the day

cleaning the bathroom with bleach dressed head to toe in black.

another brilliant highlight:
turning while getting up quickly and knocking my head so hard as though it could move through the concrete wall that i see stars and pick up a nice sized goose egg. what is a goose egg anyway?

thirsty

ah, what i wouldn't give for these two things right now! alas, the heavenly mojito is back in cuba, and jade, my new love, is in colorado this week for work....

mr. softie

just when i rejoice in not carrying my big camera every single day, now that the semester is done, i come across a scene like this and i wish i weren't just trying to make do with my iphone. but nonetheless, a beautiful moment.
many a summer evening (and early morning, noon and night) did i spend at flushing meadows corona park, working at the us open. now the boss and i will be working on a project this summer on these grounds, so tonight when we got out of work and wandered through the park i felt nostalgic for those old days of grabbing cookie and the golf cart and following the mr. softie truck all through the weaving park roads.

something to do!

http://www.earthcelebrations.com/spring.htm
for those of you who are local, bored, and interested in water, this sounds like a really cool event, recommended to me by a friend from school. mostly geared toward kids, but bet kids-at-heart would enjoy just as well. check out the above link or the below words....

JOIN & PARTICIPATE
Earth Celebrations Hudson River Pageant
in partnership with Manhattan Youth
For A Printable Flyer about the Pageant, Click Here

An ecological parade and performance art event, to raise awareness for the restoration of the Hudson River as a vital urban estuarine sanctuary, and address the future effects of climate change on the river and our shoreline in New York City.

The community is invited to participate in a Earth Celebrations ecological art workshop series at Manhattan Youth Downtown Community Center, from February 26 -May 6 creating spectacular giant paper mache puppets and spectacular costumes representing the various species and habitats of the river. The culminating pageant on Saturday, May 9, 2009, 2-5pm, (raindate: Sun. May 10) features a magnificent parade of giant puppets, spectacular costumes, music, dance, performances, songs, and poetry, highlighting the river and issues. The performances are presented at the various piers and significant sites along the parade route, from Manhattan Youth to Gansevoort Street, in the downtown portion of the Hudson River Park.

VOLUNTEER: COMMUNITY, ARTISTS, PUPPETEERS, COSTUME-MAKERS, MUSICIANS, POETS, & DANCERS
* Assist Puppet & Costume Workshops: ( teens & adults )
* Volunteer for behind the scenes event production
* Sign up to be a Hudson River Costume Spirit, or Puppet Volunteer, or Parade Marshal.
* Participate as a musician, poet, dancer, in performance presentation in the pageant and along the parade route.
* Children of all ages join the pageant as mermaids and river creatures & find out about additional workshops & pageant participation opportunities such as Live Fish Release!
* Organizations, schools, community centers, invited to host workshops to create costumes & participate as a local River Species group such as Sea Horses, Oysters, Crabs, & Fish.

VOLUNTEERS NEEDED - SIGN UP TO PARTICIPATE IN HUDSON RIVER PAGEANT
To Restore the Hudson River & Address Climate Change in New York City
Volunteers are needed to participate for various roles.
Sign up to:
- Wear a spectacular marine species costume
- Carry a river creature puppet
- Join as a parade marshal directing puppets and volunteers
- help with security and crowd control
- hand out programs & help with mailing list
among many other colorful and exciting tasks!

Call (212) 777-7969 or mail@earthcelebrations.com

sappy, sentimental: in love

upon my return from the restaurant restroom in cuba, the ever present green st. pat's beads greeted me in such a heart-melting fashion....

runaway

i snapped this photo at a freelance catering job i did a few months ago in a house on the upper east side. this little redhead 8-year-old was teasing me--asking for photos then running away. something about this image makes me love life....

i'm in love...i'm all shook up.

thursday, 26 february, 2009: jakob the docent

i used to be the docent in this amazing art class, which means i was a helper. now that i'm the exalted teacher's assistant, i realize what an overachieving docent i was (surprised?). docents come each semester and they go. but only until jakob came this semester did anyone measure up to the advanced level of genuine ass-kissing, bending-over-backwards, and intuiting-my-every need that i did. and now i understood why everyone loves me.
because i love jakob. he makes life easier and so pleasantly too. and i love how, despite the fact that there are 200+ built in seats with desks, jakob insists on sitting in a separate chair in the corner. all the better to jump up and help kitty joe's any whim. including feeding the parking meter quarters at hourly intervals when i have the boss's truck. oh, abuse of power....

waking up in bed stuy

these days are long and full. i've been waking up with the sun...

un dia tipico

what can i say? i've abandonned you. you've probably abandonned me. sorry! life is transient and jammed packed as i head into my final three weeks of school running way behind. i have secrets i cannot tell, so i give you a new photo from habana vieja, whose spell i haven't yet shaken.

rez's mom

tuesday, 24 february 2009 rez's mom

it's another poll. which one do you prefer, and why? these two benefit from clicking to enlarge. i'm most interested in the sparkle the sunlight gives to little details like hair, eyes. and the fine lines that women try to hide, yet, how beautiful she is.