happy birthday allyson, even though you're totally forbidden from reading this profanity sprinkled blog

the crazy! banner you see up there comes courtesy of my ingenious niece (right, holding baby cousin, rory). allyson enters the teen years today. this is apparently something she is very excited about. that's difficult for me to relate to, as this was something that, twenty years ago, scared the shit out of me, as i read seventeen and sassy magazine cover to cover, including the fine print of the tampon ads, waiting for the mysterious, ominous monster called puberty to strike me down with a skillet.
if this is allyson's mindset, she is certainly hiding it. so here's to the brave, brainy, beautiful and talented allyson. she sent me the above (oh so flattering) photo collage a few months ago. it came coincidentally sized to blog header specs. this is interesting considering she's not supposed to know that i have a blog. but neither is my mom. and we know how well that worked. i'm totally anonymous and full of tact. anyhoo.
allyson is spending this momentous birthday doing her favorite thing--flexing her leg muscles and kicking soccer balls around a field at a san francisco tournament. bravo.

could she really be a year old?

the most sweet-natured baby on the planet turns one today. in honor of little niece miss rorykins lets all stop whining and put a cute smile on our faces.

and with the 'rents...

innundated with cuddles

worked till 3 am at gotham hall, went home to pack and shower, then airport at 5am. all worth it for this moment--five minutes in the door at abbie's and sleeping rory charlotte sighing in my arms. kyle, at fourteen, shows, you're never too old to cuddle with auntie!

the rory lovefest continues

there's just no stopping me! i've caught rory photo posting madness. but seriously, i was quite upset by the lack of photos of rory with abbie and amy. so here they are. mama and baby all sacked out cute style, and auntie amy doting on aforementioned little one. i'm now plotting my secret escape to california so i can change lots of dirty diapers and munch on baby legs.

the closer look you (my imaginary readers) have been desperate for!

here she is, still just hours old, posing for auntie amy, who has already warned her to get used to it, because she's planning on taking at least a million pictures of rory by the time she is a year old. that takes the pressure off this auntie's pictures to be any good!

so the word is out. in addition to the 2oz weight discrepancy, the identical birth height, and 3 minute off birth time, looks like rory charlotte is taking even more after auntie kitty by charming all with her sweet, agreeable demeanor. now regardless of the loud, bossy monster i may have morphed into in the past three decades, i do have quite the reputation for having been a sweet and calm baby. at least that's what my mom says. and mom's are always right and completely unbiased. well, she certainly never made those claims about amy and abbie....

being a baby is like being britney spears or the grand canyon. everyone wants to pose for a photo op with you. i am especially an authority on the britney spears example, because once at a bus stop in the dusty interior of turkey at 5am, i was mistaken for britney by a bus of women wearing traditional head scarves, and appropriately fauned over and posed with. they didn't buy my protests, because, you know, i look just like her. true story. ask tristan.

here is rory obliging my various familial connections: (photos may be enlarged by clicking)















here is where you have to excuse my lack of web knowledge. i'd love to lay these photos out nicely, yet, don't know how! hopefully the order goes like so: proud brother, 14 year old kyle,

little cousin anika (age 7),

nana--my mom, who can't ever get enough babies!

cousin allyson (age 11), who grilled johnny the first time they met (abbie and johhny had been dating one month) on when they'd get married and have babies,

grandpa gus (age...oh jeez, nevermind!)